I spent a few days in New Mexico a couple of weeks ago with a good friend, doing a soul retrieval.
A "what" you might ask, that was exactly what I asked her about a year ago, but it finally was time to take her up on her offer. Was I afraid, scared, nervous, anxious, optimistic, pessimistic, all of the above? You bet your ass I was, and as I got closer and closer to Las Vegas the more anxious I became.
When the big day came it was met with a lot of talking and sharing the day that brought me to this place in my life. I relived it as if it just happened earlier in the morning, the tears flowed, and the vision of May 28, 2013 became real all over again.
What is a soul retrieval was my biggest question, there were really no answers other than "parts of my soul had escaped, left and were wandering"
After almost three hours of (the best way I can describe it) the two of us meditating, it was over. Confusion, feeling better, wondering what just happened and being able to talk to Nic and hear him tell me a that the things that I had been living with were okay, that he knew all along, and don't jack with the tattoo I was wanting to get we just sat and talked about what had just happened.
How was I going to repay the spirit that had just helped me? I committed to seeing the good everyday for the next month, paying it forward in Nic's name once a week for the next month and to volunteer to help at Kidzcope this month. Have I held true to my word? Well I wake up differently every day, I've payed it forward each week (and will continue to, I even have a card that tells why that I give out), and while it's not actually volunteering in the month of February, I have signed up to volunteer as the "hostess" (LOL) for the next eight weeks.
Has it been easier to cope with the events of May 28, 2013? I'm not sure that easier is the right word, but the word "softer" do come to mind, what is it that I'm called to do? I'm not really sure, other than to honor his memory, share his stories, maybe walk a few miles in his shoes and pay it forward to maybe help others that have found themselves in the same situation.
Have I had bad days since then, oh hell yes, and I anticipate there will be many many more coming, that's just the part of "shit happens" that happens to each and every one of us. What stands out the most as a "shit happens" day? Finding out my grand daughter went to her first "Daddy-Daughter" dance not with her Daddy, and not with her Daddy's Daddy. Talk about taking the wind out of your sails, that did it for me.
But, life goes on, people do what they do without thinking, and the sun comes up once again just like it did yesterday.
