Starting a new old career

Tomorrow's the day, starting a old career with a new company and "I feel good" 

Over 300 daily newspapers printed in 32 states with a combined paid distribution of over 2,000,000.

Those that know me know that I'm a huge proponent of the newspaper industry, specifically community newspapers.  These big metropolitan papers just don't get it, report the local news and talk about Billy and the infield home run he hit in the 8th inning that saved the day, or Suzie that won the pie baking contest at the local county fair. 

That's what sells newspapers.  Anyone can print stuff off the wire but it's the real news, the local and regional news that keep this industry alive.

So how did I get back to this industry?  There was a lot of time involved and I think it was time to get back to the basics of what I enjoy, love and believe in.

February 4th was my last day as the Director of Operations and Marketing with Williams ACE Hardware after we closed our store in Goddard.  Believe me when you read this, I loved working there and I loved the people that I worked with (well most of them anyway, you know who you are). 

Over 30 resumes and 9 interviews with other companies I found the place I want to be, mind you I could have been selling for True Green, been an insurance agent for countless places, I was offered to be a demonstrator at Sam's Club, had a couple of new business development opportunities come my way and I even interviewed to put scent in the air (if you want a great story sometime just ask me to tell you about the worlds worst interview).

But there's something about the newspaper industry that is in my blood.  The ink, the smell, the sales cycle, meeting new people and transferring some of my skill to those younger kids.

What is a dad to do when it's that time of year once again

What in the hell does that mean Kurt?

There are months that have special meaning to me, December is Christmas, November is Turkey Day, October is Halloween and Birthdays, September is my birthday, August is another Birthday, July is Independence Day, May is Memorial Day, April is normally Easter, February is Valentines Day and January is the start of the New Year.

But what about those months that have an even more current meaning to me?

• April is when Nic and I had a really huge fight over my life and his thoughts on what it should be, we always agreed to disagree, but sometimes is became a really heated battle, I guess that's what fathers and sons do.
• May is when Nic and I made amends, we had a couple of drinks at Mort's and then Dinner with his sisters and then 15 days later he left this earth.
• September leads up to his birthday with the entire month of October being one of those other miss you months because of his birthday and Halloween which he loved because of his daughter
• November and December both suck because I know he won't be here to celebrate in person.

 So what is a father that is still grieving the loss of his son to do?  Who the fuck knows at this point, I can tell you that over the past three years I've;

• Pushed people out of my life, people that were my friends and I mean some of my best friends for no reason other than I just couldn't deal with the questions and the sharing of memories about Nic
• Stopped letting people into my life, not because I am cold and heartless, but because it's easier to keep people at a distance and not be affected by their lives or subject myself to questions or the outside chance that something tragic happens in their life
• Stopped sharing nearly as much as I once did, if I keep it inside it means I don't have to relive the grief and once again I'm protected
• Forgotten how to love and I mean really really love, sure I love my kids and my grand kids, but that's an entirely different kind of love, that's the kind that will never go away, can't be swayed and can't go away.  (if you don't have grand children you have no clue what I'm talking about)
• Thrown myself into my work, 12-15 hour days were not uncommon the past couple of years and now that I am unemployed I have no clue what to do with myself other than wake up, look for a job, smoke, drink, go to bed and start all over again

Depressed, yea maybe just a titch,,,,,,feel sorry for myself, never.

So what's a guy to do?
Live, that's the best anyone can do and maybe another tat.